On The Question Of Virginity, Or, "Starter? I Can't Make Her Stop!"

by: fake consultant

Sun Dec 11, 2011 at 02:19:39 AM MST

He's had a crazy car problem, he has, and over the past few months he thought he had found a solution - in fact, he thought he had found the solution of his dreams - but in the end, he's discovered that the things you dream about often don't go according to plan.

The way it's worked out for him so far, it's been a lot of anticipation followed by a sudden wave of frustration, but I feel like he's a lot better off having his particular problem with his car...because if he'd had cancer instead, he'd surely be dead by now.  

A Win For Democracy

by: KathrynCWallace

Sun Sep 04, 2011 at 08:17:23 AM MST

Short history: In the 2010 election, there were two races that were extremely close, including the Clerk's race.  There was also a tax measure that was decided by one single vote.  All of this is exactly the sort of circumstance that cries for recounts and re-examination.  Indeed, the "public" believes that we WILL have recounts and examinations in such close cases, it is part of why anyone has any faith in our democratic process.  But in this case, not even the canvass board was willing to certify the election.  In short there was no validation of this election by any citizen review.  We had the word of the clerk alone that these results were accurate.  As Carroll says:

Too many clerks seem to believe that they should be both the first and last line of defense of election integrity. No one must look over their shoulder or second-guess procedures - or at least no one outside the official club. Hence the clerks' repeated attempts to keep voted ballots under wraps and their strained explanations for why voter identity could be breached if they do not.

On Doing Better Than 50%, Or, Could More "Made In USA" Mean More Jobs?

by: fake consultant

Mon Aug 15, 2011 at 18:53:41 PM MST

They are also going to have to come up with ideas that are pretty much "bulletproof", meaning that they are so hard to object to that even Allen West and Louie Gohmert will not want to be on record saying "no no no!"; alternatively, solutions that work around the legislative process entirely could represent the other form of "bulletproof-ery".

Well, I have one of those "maybe bulletproof" ideas for you today, and it has to do with how "Made in USA" the things are that our Government buys.

On Organizing Anger, Or, Could Olbermann Primary Obama?

by: fake consultant

Sat Aug 06, 2011 at 01:44:05 AM MST

He pointed out that the only way those on the left were going to be able to fight against those who are looking to get all "Tea Party" is to be as angry and as organized and as aggressive as the Tea Party community, and if we're smart, we'll take him up on that challenge.

But if you really want to push "professional" Democrats to the left, most especially this President, and you want to do it in time to impact the '12 cycle, the only way to do it is to run a candidate in primary contests that either moves the conversation your way...or leaves you with a surprising new Candidate.

And right here, right now, we actually have a chance to do exactly that - and that's why, in today's discussion, I'm going to challenge Olbermann right back.

On Running Your Own Government, Or, Why Pay The Military?

by: fake consultant

Sat Jul 30, 2011 at 04:15:31 AM MST

You will hear a lot of conversation about the consequences from others; today, however, you are going to get the chance to be both the President and the Secretary of the Treasury, and you will get to decide for yourself exactly what bills the Federal Government should and should not pay as the cash runs out if a deal is not made by the time borrowing authority runs out.

At that point you'll be able to see what's coming for yourself - and once you do, you won't need me to tell you what ugly is going to look like.

The Caucus System A Good Thing.

by: GMFORD

Tue Jul 26, 2011 at 09:52:17 AM MST

Recently I've come to realize the caucus serves a really important service by winnowing out the fringe candidates, narrowing the field down to truly viable ones. When CA had the recall election for governor, there were at least 25 names to choose from on the ballot, split between Dems and Reps. Most of the names were not familiar to me or to anyone I talked to.

I, and everyone I know, ended up voting for Schwarzenneger(sp?) because we recognized him and knew that he was pretty moderate for a Republican. For all we knew, any Democrat we chose might have been completely crazy or have ethical problems. Better to choose the devil that we knew.

That doesn't happen here in CO because of the caucuses. By the time the primary election comes around, the field has narrowed down to only two or three best. The extra time between caucus and primary allows all of them to make their case for election.

So, even though not everyone can participate in the caucuses, they help us pick the best candidates.  I've decided they are a good thing.

Hitler Holds News Conference, Blames Balanced Budget Amendment For U.S. Defeat

by: fake consultant

Tue Jul 26, 2011 at 09:03:01 AM MST

"All those ideas Mr. Roosevelt spoke of", said Hitler, "Lend-Lease, modular shipbuilding, War Bonds, secret weapons...in the end, all of them were just words, since the Americans' Congress was never willing to allow the country to fully fund its war effort."  

On Being Bumped, Or, Let's Have Another Roundup

by: fake consultant

Mon Jul 04, 2011 at 10:18:21 AM MST

But that's OK, because the world's been busy doing a lot of other things - and while many of them get media coverage, some don't get a lot of notice at all.

And of course, there are also those stories that look one way at first glance...but look a lot different when you dig a bit deeper.

We'll hit a few of those today, have a bit of fun doing it, and get ready for what promises to be another busy week of strategically not doing things in Washington.

To make things even better, some of the stories will be real, and some won't.

We'll see if you can tell the difference.

CO Sec of State defies constitution, overturns transparency election laws

by: wade norris

Thu Jun 16, 2011 at 12:16:21 PM MST

On Sunday Drinking, Or, Has Satan Been Rendered Irrelevant?

by: fake consultant

Tue May 17, 2011 at 06:39:06 AM MST

Of course, the reason I don't drink on Sundays is because that's when Satan likes to go hang out at my favorite bar - and to be real honest with you, lately Satan's getting to be a real drag to hang out with once he gets drinking.

I mean, it's depressing: he's always talking about how he gets blamed for the economy, even though he claims he has no control over Wall Street, and atheism is a bit of a sore subject - and he's forever complaining about how all his best customers have been outsourcing more and more work to Varsavarti.

But if you think all that's a drag to have to deal with...you should hear him complain about Republican Presidential Politics.

Social Security: Are You Ready For A Congressional "Video Staycation"?

by: fake consultant

Sun Apr 03, 2011 at 22:00:18 PM MST

Now what I have for you today starts out as a bit of insider information that came to me on background-but it turns into a chance for those of us who support Social Security to very much get in the faces of our members of Congress, for two whole weeks.

And to make it even better, I'm going to throw out a few direct action ideas "for your consideration" (as they say in Hollywood during Awards Season) that would absolutely make good street actions and YouTube videos, both at the same time...and even more importantly, we'll absolutely make some great Spring Break fun.  

On Monday Morning Philosophy, Or, Founders Tell America: "You Figure It Out"

by: fake consultant

Tue Mar 22, 2011 at 12:05:04 PM MST

Some among us have managed to turn their certainty into something that approaches a reverential calling, and you need look no further than the Supreme Court to find such notables as Cardinals Samuel Alito and Antonin Scalia providing "liturgical foundation" to the adherents of the point of view that the Constitution is like The Bible: that it's somehow immutable, set in stone, and, if we would only listen to the right experts, easily interpreted.

But what if that absolutist point of view is absolutely wrong?

What if the Original Intent Of The Founders, that summer in Philadelphia...was simply to get something passed out of the Constitutional Convention, and the only way that could happen was to leave a lot of the really tough decisions to the future?

What if The Real Original Intent...was that we work it out for ourselves as we go along?

Don't let these 'Democrats' get away with it either

by: wade norris

Sun Mar 20, 2011 at 12:55:14 PM MST

Campaign Manifesto #3: On The Road, Defending Social Security

by: fake consultant

Mon Feb 28, 2011 at 02:53:44 AM MST

The Fake Campaign, as you may recall, is fake headed for Wisconsin, to show solidarity, and we've fake hitched a ride on a delivery truck headed for Rush Limbaugh's Florida broadcasting studios-but we fake found ourselves caught up in the all-too-real Giant Grip Of Winter that has seized the Midwest over the past week.

We're back on the road now, but we were stuck for darn near a half-day there at Wall...and if you know anything about South Dakota, you know there are really only two things to do in the City of Wall: you can shuffle back and forth between Gold Diggers and the Badlands Bar, partaking of numerous intoxicating liquors along the way...or you can head on into Wall Drug (the same one that's on all those bumper stickers and signs) and partake of the finest display of Giant Jackalopia on the planet.

The Campaign, naturally, chose Jackalopia-and that's why today's Manifesto is all about the fake impromptu 5-cent-coffee-fueled Social Security Town Hall that we held in the Wall Drug Mall for several hours while we waited for I-90 to reopen.

Campaign Manifesto #1: In A World Of Phonies, It's Time For A Fake Candidate

by: fake consultant

Fri Feb 18, 2011 at 07:08:18 AM MST

We have a wavering President, far too many feckless Democrats, and Republicans that have decided to dive headfirst into total "insane mode" in a full-blown effort to destroy this country just as fast as possible.

To give but one example, in my own District, WA-08, we are represented by the absolutely useless Republican Dave Reichert, whose best-known legislative achievement is that he has virtually no record of any legislative achievement whatever.

Now we've had a very interesting relationship, you and I, over these past few years; in my efforts to "bring you the story" I've been a fake political consultant, a fake lobbyist, even a fake historian...and now, I think it's time to try to bring our relationship to a new level.

And that's why, America, I'm announcing my fake candidacy for Congress.

Time to roll out the Obama/Clinton 2012 ticket

by: wade norris

Wed Nov 03, 2010 at 10:41:15 AM MST

This is not a new idea - it has already been written about and I have to agree with Mr. Hutchinson's assessment:

As Obama's VP in 2012, Hillary will bring the same top notch political qualities to the reelection campaign that she brought to the 2008 campaign. ... She will still be a role model and inspiration for millions of women young and old. She will prove that women can hold a top political power spot that requires providing valuable policy guidance and expertise on tough domestic and foreign policy issues...
Hillary will also bring another priceless quality to the ticket. She is not intimidated by the GOP smear machine.

Should another Bush be put in charge of Colorado's budget?

by: wade norris

Tue Oct 05, 2010 at 16:53:47 PM MST

Let's take a look at the two candidates.
Cary Kennedy has a track record of helping the State of Colorado navigate Colorado through the difficult budget crises and working with across the aisle to solve problems with our budget.
She helped author parts of Referendum C in 2005 - which was supported by Republican Governor Bill Owens as a way to keep the state budget solvent.
Since becoming Treasurer in 2007, she has made the sound investments that have kept Colorado's Budget growing at a moderate 3% annually, at a time when other states are defaulting on their loans.
What kind of leadership does Walker Stapleton have to offer?  

If You Care about Clean Energy, You Should Care About Midterm Elections Too

by: NRDC Action Fund

Wed Sep 01, 2010 at 06:46:44 AM MST

August has passed without any major town hall eruptions, but that doesn’t mean it is a quiet time in American politics. Midterm-election campaigns are heating up, and it’s becoming clear that these races could determine what gets accomplished in the next Congress.

This includes what we do -- or don't do -- on clean energy and climate solutions.

Comprehensive climate legislation may be off the table right now, but the tenor and outcome of these elections will still have an enormous influence on our energy future. They will decide when we succeed in generating millions of green jobs and cleaning up our energy supply.

I urge all of you who care about these issues to get active in this campaign season. Candidates need to know that clean energy and global warming matter to voters - matter so much, in fact, that some lawmakers will lose their jobs because they didn't act boldly enough.

Go to campaign events, write to your candidates, and let them know that clean energy is a top priority for you. Whatever you do, don't sit this one out. We need your voices, and here is why.

Primary Ballots Drop Today

by: Fong

Mon Jul 19, 2010 at 05:58:31 AM MST

Cry babies :'(

According to the Colorado Secretary of State, Democrat and Republican party registration numbers for the entire state of Colorado as of June is

Dems:  817,458
Reps:  855,667
Unaff:  765,849

And, as Eluning points out in the comments, the Libertarians have their own primary with nearly 8,000 registered Libs.

If you have any questions or need resources from your County Clerk & Recorder, you can find contact information here.  

The Republican Plan for Recovery

by: Fong

Fri Jul 09, 2010 at 23:39:07 PM MST

Morons.

Now, about these Conservative-backed (and illegally funded??) current ballot initiatives, one Repub meme is "no debt" which, again the vulnerable voter would equate with borrowing which is in part what the "Dr Evil Amendments" 60, 61, and 101 on the ballot this Nov seek to do.

The Denver Business Journal (yes, it has the word business in it, all hail business AUM) has a piece about how, if passed, these amendments would send Colorado into another recession. Who wants that?

Well, Republicans want that. Republicans want Obama and all Democrats to fail so they can get re-elected and continue their raping and pillaging of our nations resources.